Sentimental Sunday - A Senior Class Picture with No Yearbook to Call Home

What a babe, right? ;)

***WARNING!  SKELETONS FALLING OUT OF CLOSETS!***

No laughing!  Well, OK you can laugh.  I had big hair in the Fall of 1989.  I fought with my hair on a regular basis.  Heck, I still fight with my hair the majority of the time, but I think I'm starting to win.

Anyway, this post is obviously about me.  I decided to do it even though I cringe to look at my 17 year old self's hair.  This summer when I went back home to visit with family and do some research, I took some pictures of old Hazleton High School yearbooks and it dawned on me that when my descendants looked through yearbooks for their ancestors (if they look through yearbooks), I wouldn't be there.  Would they wonder why?  I realized that I wanted the story as to why passed on so when people go looking they'll know why. 

Not being in my yearbook wasn't by choice.  Well, it was partly by choice, but not because I didn't want to be in a yearbook or anything.  I just didn't know it was going to play out that way.  If I could borrow Doctor Who's time machine I'd go back in time and smack some yearbook people around...and then I'd smack myself around.  Perhaps those aren't the best words considering the story that gets me to the lack of a being in a yearbook.

All of this needs a bit of explaining, so I'm going to dive in, but this is where the skeletons start to fall out.  The story is much more involved than "My school made a boo boo".  The story is not a nice one and it is a bit disturbing so turn back now if you're squeamish! It's a part of my family's history and ignoring it doesn't change it, so here goes...

I lived in Hazleton, Pennsylvania for 17 years.  My parents began divorcing when I was in 2nd grade.  Long story, but my dad ended up with custody of us kids through a series of manipulation/guilt techniques.  So much for not using your kids in a divorce.  He was all about doing whatever it took to get my mother to stay...to not lose control.  He's a control freak...and she was leaving.  He actually convinced himself that she would eventually come back and did everything to drag out the divorce.  As long as it wasn't finalized then there was a chance, right?

In 1986 (four years before I would graduate from high school) he lost control of another member of his family.  My older sister graduated from high school and immediately left to live with my mom.  I've been told the story several times as to why she left, but I never write it down and I always forget it.  Why?  Bad memories + me = blocking.  I do need to talk to my mom and sister and finally write it down, because she did have her reasons for leaving.  I know that my father and sister had a fight before the graduation ceremony though and he told her that he wasn't going to her graduation.  He went, but he told her he didn't.  She went on for years believing he wasn't there.  That's the kind of guy he was.  My sister left and never turned back.  She hasn't spoken to him since 1986.  Harsh?  Just you wait...

In 1988 my mom finally got the divorce pushed through, she remarried and soon after had my baby sister.  I met my baby sister for the first time in 1989 when she was a few weeks old.  I was going to the prom with my boyfriend (a senior) and my mom and step-dad brought her to the prom so I could meet her.  I always loved babies and my baby sister is probably the catalyst that caused me to stop treating my mom like she was the bad guy and to renew a proper mother-daughter relationship with her.  My father had all three of his daughters treating my mother with contempt for years...we all eventually woke up and saw reality.  This was the beginning of my awakening.

My boyfriend joined the Air Force and went away.  While he was gone I began visiting my mom more.  My dad didn't like this.  He didn't say it, but I'm smart enough to figure it out.  I was dating.  I wasn't letting him bad mouth my mother in front of me anymore.  I had a job....and a smart mouth, but that was nothing new.  I was becoming an independent young woman which meant he was losing control.

It only happened 3 times.  Yeah, I know I said that I block bad things, but there are some things that don't get completely blocked.  I smart-mouthed my father one evening in the summer and he slapped me.  And slapped me.  And slapped me.  I was backed into the corner of my bedroom and couldn't get away and he just continued to slap me.  I was screaming and doing my best to cover my head and face with my arms.  I had fallen to the floor in the corner of my room by the open window.  He calmly stopped what he was doing, shut the windows in my room and came back and resumed slapping me.  The next day I had to work.  It had to have been July or August and it was warm.  I had bruises all over my arms.  I wore long-sleeves to work.  People at work did notice.  One person asked.  No one ever did anything though.  One of those things, that you kind of wish someone would be your hero, but no one wants to interfere.

I wrote to my boyfriend about what happened.  He was on his way home.  Being discharged from the military for medical reasons.  At least he'd be back soon and I'd have a bit of an escape.  The second time happened shortly after he got back.  I had just gotten back from seeing him and he wanted me to call him when I got home.  I did.  My father came out of the kitchen and started screaming at me.  I don't remember why.  There really didn't have to be a reason to get him to start.  Maybe my room was a mess.  Maybe he just didn't like the fact that I was out with my boyfriend.  I never asked.  There was little point in asking.  But I yelled back at him and he punched me.  Not in the face.  In the arm, not that it really mattered.  It hurt and I started crying.  My boyfriend knew what happened immediately, and I heard from the other end of the phone, "He did it again, didn't he?"

It wasn't long after that the last time happened.  It was October and I had just come back from hanging out with my boyfriend and his family at their house.  As soon as I walked in the house he started yelling at me for whatever reason and I got mouthy.  I was standing next to my bed and he shoved me.  He shoved me so hard that I flew over the bed and landed on the floor on the other side.  I picked up my purse and ran out of the house and to my boyfriend's.  He called my mom and told her what was going on and that she needed to come and get me because I couldn't go back there.  A little over an hour later, my mom and step-dad arrived, escorted me to my house and had me pack some stuff up quickly.  We'd be back for the rest later.  It was late.

And so I moved in October of my senior year.  I moved an hour away.  I started at a brand new school.  I was glad to be with my mom, but I was a bit upset at not being in Hazleton High School anymore.  That's where my friends were.  As a young 17 year old I just couldn't conceive of starting off new.  I was a shy kid (at least until you got to know me) and going to a new school was intimidating.

I had given my senior picture to the Hazleton High School yearbook.  When I moved I had already ordered a yearbook and I made sure to let them know that I wanted my picture to stay in that yearbook since that's where my heart was.  I didn't find out until I picked up my copy of the yearbook that it wasn't in there.  Words cannot describe the hurt I felt.  This is about where I'd like that time machine so I could smack someone at the HHS yearbook, but it's also when I'd like to go back and smack myself.  I never turned my picture into my new school's yearbook.  I was stubborn to a fault.  Regardless of my scared little girl feelings, I did make friends at Pocono Mountain High School.  A wonderful small group of friends that I was probably closer to than most of my HHS friends.  I bought a yearbook, but my picture, of course, wasn't there either because I hadn't turned it in.

Looking back part of me thinks, "Good.  It was an awful picture," but really most people don't absolutely love their senior pictures anyway.  The other part of me...the family historian/genealogist part says, "Dumbass."

So a fairly disturbing, graphic story of my dad the a-hole.  This blog post may be the only way the story of my picture...the whole story...gets told.  I don't know how long blogging will be around.  How long these posts of ours will be seen, but I will be having my blog printed annually to keep a record for future generations.  I blog to find others researching the same lines as I am.  I blog to help others by sharing local information as well, but mostly, I blog to pass on my family's story.  I don't think that family history is about hiding the bad bits.  I have had a wonderful life...with some speed bumps, but who doesn't? 

Funeral Card Friday - Mother Alphons

Front and back of card for Mother M. Alfons

"Jesus! Mary! Joseph! 'We have loved her in life, let us not forget her in death.'

In Loving Memory of our venerable

Mother M. Alfons

Superior-General of St. Joseph's Convent Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Born Apr. 3, 1850  Died Apr. 5, 1929

'My Jesus pardon and mercy through the merits of Thy Sacred Wounds.'"

This is one of over 200 memorial cards that were passed on to me.  I don't know who Mother M. Alfons was to the family, but she meant something.  Was she a relative or a beloved nun?  Or both?  Some day I hope to find out.  "We have loved her in life, let us not forget her in death."  We will not.  Your memory be preserved, Mother Alfons.

I had hoped to do a "Follow Friday" post today, but the air conditioner died yesterday afternoon.  With temperatures still over 100 degrees here in Killeen, TX I've got to limit the time I spend on the computer so it doesn't overheat.  It's a chilly 80 degrees outside right now, so a quick post and then back to waiting for the repairman and hoping he has all the parts he needs.  It could be a long weekend.  How on earth did our ancestors do this?

Wedding Wednesday - Villers Laurent

Add caption

"Villers-Laurent

 (hand-dated Aug 31, 1963)

A wedding trip to Mackinac Island is the honeymoon planned by Mr. and Mrs. Larry Cletus Laurent, who were married at 10 o'clock Saturday morning, Aug. 31, in St. Martin Catholic Church, Tonet.  The bride is the former Miss Ruthann Irene Villers, daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Ernest Villers, Algmoa, R. 2.  Mr. and Mrs. Norman Laurent, Luxemburg, Rt. 3, are parents of the bride-groom.

Maid of honor was Mrs. Wayne Cayemberg, with Miss Shirley Degrave and Miss Mary Ann Malcore as bridesmaids.  Wayne Cayemberg was best man, with Dale Romvald and James Romvald as attendants.  Ushers were Harvey Villers and Francis Queoff.

The newlyweds will return to Luxemburg, Rt. 2, after their honeymoon."

NOTE: This clipping was passed on to me by family in Green Bay, Wisconsin and was in a scrapbook full of old newspaper clippings.  It does not contain any publication information.  It most likely was published in the Green Bay Press-Gazette.

Tuesday's Tip - Inputting Data on the 1870 U.S. Census

1870 U.S. Federal Census

Last time I posted the inputtable census form for the 1860 Schedule 2 (Slave Schedule).  Today, I've got the form up so you can download, input your data and save to your computer information from the 1870 U.S. Federal Census!

No more slavery!  Remember this census was taken a mere 5 years after the Civil War concluded and one of the most noticeable changes (apart from not needing another schedule and not having "Free inhabitants" written at the top) is that last question...good ol' #20, "Male Citizens of the U.S. of 21 years of age and upwards, whose right to vote is denied or abridged on other grounds than rebellion or other crime."

Why was this needed?  Here's the excerpt from the Instructions to Assistant Marshals:

1870 Instructions to Assistant Marshals - U.S. Census Bureau

Since the Civil War had been concluded, what a perfect time for the Federal Government to ensure that those former slaves are not being denied the right to vote via illegal laws (that should have been repealed and are null and void).

The entire 26 pages of Instructions to Assistant Marshals are actually quite interesting, and truthfully all instructions should be read so that you can fully understand the intent of the questions asked as well as the enumerators' responsibilities.  You'll most likely get more out of the census if you do!

These instructions as well as other great information on the 1870 census can be found on the U.S. Census Bureau's website.

Again, 1930census.com gives us the map of the U.S. at the time of the census and a historical chronology for the decade of the census to help put it all in perspective.  Their link for questions asked is empty (bummer!), but we can easily get that information by looking at the census.

The census form I created is in landscape view as opposed to portrait like the original.  I did take a tip from Ancestry.com's sheet (which is also in landscape) when creating this spreadsheet.  It was possible to create one just like the original census, but my concern was that the questions would be too difficult to read and defeat the purpose of the form.  As a result there are only 6 lines to input the family data for an ancestor.  I know...many of our ancestors had more than 6 people in their family, but you can easily continue on another sheet.  The goal is digitization and not so much paper (at least for me).

The spreadsheet is still locked so you can't accidentally type over the form data, but I left the section on the far left unlocked so you can change the numbers to correspond with the numbers for your ancestors.  They are currently numbered 1 through 6 but can easily be changed.

As always, just let me know if there are any problems with the spreadsheet and I'll get them fixed.  The spreadsheet still looks like it's multiple pages in Google Documents, but will be one page once it's downloaded.

Until next week, when I hope to get the 1880 U.S. Federal Census up, have fun tending those roots!

Free Immigration and Travel Records on Ancesty.com!

Well, the Subject line kind of says it all.  For those of you without access to Ancestry.com (or without full access), you can view their immigration and travel records from August 29th (today!) through September 5th.  So this Labor Day Weekend make sure you do some laboring on your genealogy and family history!

Military Monday - Lance Cpl. Dan A. Van Erem

"Lance Cpl. Dan A. Van Erem

Lance Cpl. Dan A. Van Erem, 21, 124 Jacobs St., was killed in action in Vietnam [sic] on January 5.  He graduated from Preble High School in June 1967 and enlisted in the Marines in November 1967.  His mother is the former Myrtle Willame.

Survivors are his parents, Mr. and Mrs. Lawrence Van Erem, one brother, Lawrence Jr., Sheboygan; four sisters, Mrs. Harold (Deloris) St. Thomas; Mrs. Richard (Lorraine) Gay; Mrs. John (Shirley) Hyer; Mrs. David (Nancy) Badeau, all of Green Bay; maternal grandmother, Mrs. John Willame, New Franken.

In state at Malcore Funeral Home after 6:30 p.m. Thursday.  Rosary 8 each evening, Friday by the Rev. Edward Haessly.  Funeral 10 a.m. Saturday, St. Bernard Church.  Burial in Allouez Cemetery.

A memorial fund has been established."

"Lance Cpl. Dan A. Van Erem

In State at Malcore Funeral home after 6:30 tonight.  Rosary 8 tonight, and Friday by the Rev. Edward Haessly.  Funeral 10 a.m. Saturday, St. Bernard Church.  Allouez Cemetery.  A memorial fund has been established.  Cpl. Van Erem was killed in action in Vietnam on January 5."


NOTE:  These clippings were passed on to me by family in Green Bay, Wisconsin.  It was in a scrapbook filled with newspaper clippings and had no publication information.  It may have been published in the Green Bay Press-Gazette

Sunday's Obituary - Frank Villers

"Frank Villers, 63, Dies This Morning(hand-dated - Sept 1, 1954)

CASCO, Wis. - Frank Villers, 63, died at 2:30 this morning at his farm home at Rosiere after an illness of four years.

Mr. Villers was born on the Lincoln Township farm Jan. 28, 1891, and was married to Mary LaCrosse May 20, 1913.  he was a member of the Holy Name society of St. Hubert Church, Rosiere.

Survivors include his wife; a son, Louis, at home; one grandson, Marvin; a brother, Joe, of Green Bay, and two sisters, Mrs. Louis Villers and Mrs. William Wendricks, Green Bay.

Friends may call at the Wiesner - Massart Funeral Home here beginning Thursday afternoon, and the rosary will be recited at 8 o'clock Thursday and Friday evenings.  The last rites will be conducted in St. Hubert Church at 9:30 a.m. Saturday by the Rev. Henry Zelinske and burial will be in the church cemetery."

Sadly, this clipping tells me nothing of his parents.  Don't you love it?  Luckily, I can find by looking at the 1930 U.S. Federal Census (Lincoln, Kewaunee, Wisconsin) that his parents, Louis and Emmerance Villers, were living with Frank and Mary Villers.  At least that mystery is solved.  Now to find out where Frank belongs in my tree, because we have Villers, but no Frank, Louis or Emmerance Villers...

NOTE:  This clipping was passed on to me by family in Green Bay, Wisconsin.  It was taken from a scrapbook filled with newspaper clippings an does not have any publication information.  The date written on the article is most likely the date of death and not publication.  The clipping was most likely taken from the Green Bay Press-Gazette.